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5 Beautiful Gifts For A Mother of Miscarriage :: Vol. 25 #5faves

May 24, 2016 By Deb B. 10 Comments

Gifts for a Mother of Miscarriage?

I know… my post title sounds heavy. Depressing even. And I’m sure you’re thinking – isn’t this a kid’s fashion blog? About clothes? Kids? The latest trends?

This is all true. However, the author behind this blog is also a mom. And not just your everyday mom of the one child that keeps making an appearance on every post. I am a mom of 9. Eight of them, are not with me. And yes – it’s depressing. And heavy.

But I’m okay.

And not because I’m over it, and definitely not because I am passed the grief. It’s because it was overall, a life-changing, priority-straightening, horrific experience repeated many, MANY times over, and I am here today in a better place than I was yesterday. And the day before that. And the day before that. But I didn’t do it alone. My family, my living child, and my friends – both casual and close, did all they could to help me through it. Their empathetic tears, lack of judgement, love, generosity of heart, and support is what this seemingly resilient woman needed, to face her greatest weakness. Loss. There are many moments – too many to count – in the last 3 years of my life, where I never thought I could get through it. But with these small yet profound acts of kindness, I got through the most challenging moments of my life, and continue to do so. And I would love to share them with you.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage

Here are my 5 absolute favorite gifts I received from my friends and fellow mother’s of loss to help me through mine. Five beautiful gifts for a mother of miscarriage:

1:: WORKS OF ART

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage
I have never seen anything quite like this. My friend who suffered loss twice, one mid-way through her pregnancy, and one in her first trimester, developed a passion of expressing her grief through mixed media. She painted a beautiful backdrop overlooking the vast ocean. She often takes long walks along the beach when she’s feeling especially fragile and picks up rocks and shells along the way. One day, she decided to take it upon herself to make me, what I like to call, a work of heart. She placed rocks in such a way that acknowledges my living family of three, surrounded by 7 rocks with shells emulating wings (this was shortly before I suffered my 8th miscarriage recently). The day after what would have been my son Charlie‘s due date last December, which was also the day of what would have been her son’s due date, she came to my home and gave me this unbelievable gift of love. I couldn’t see past my tears. It amazes me that someone I had met through loss (our support group was the catapult that brought many of my friendships together) found it in their freshly mended heart, to think outside of themselves. An act so kind, I can barely put the words together.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage
On this past Mother’s Day, I had a beautiful brunch with some fellow mother’s of loss. We exchanged laughs, enjoyed a filling meal, and handed out greetings and gifts. One of my dear friends gave me a beautiful card shaped into a heart painted in the warmest of tones, with a beautiful message written on it. The message was something I have always longed to hear, yet never felt wholeheartedly throughout this process. Brave? How is that possible? I have always felt weak, and unable to cope. But for someone to tell me on Mother’s Day that I, as a mother of babies gone too soon, am indeed brave – I have never really thought it was true. That is, until I actually saw this written on paper reminding me of what I needed to hear. Another beautiful friend of mine gave me a rose quartz in honour of being a mother. I was blown away by its fragility and strength. I often touch its surface in my purse to remind me that “I got this” – when times seem especially unbearable. I absolutely love the simplicity of this very important gift that I bring everywhere with me. Such perfect gifts for a mother of miscarriage especially on bitter-sweet occasions like Mother’s Day.

2:: MY CHILDREN’S NAMES

My husband and I have made the decision to name four of our eight babies. They were healthy babies that made it to the mid-way point of our pregnancy, and we were blessed to have experienced the beautiful sounds of their heartbeats, their loving kicks and flutters, and the knowledge of their gender. We have since determined the possible cause of their untimely deaths, though I will leave that for another post. For three of these four babies, we held memorial services and cremated them helping us through the transition of acceptance. They were and still are our babies. And they go by the names, Victoria, William, Lucy, and Charlie. All names I have always wanted my children to have one day. And now that has become my reality.For some, it’s a strange notion that I have named these babies. Miscarriage and pregnancy & baby loss are typically a topic of discomfort. And I don’t expect everyone to understand what we’ve had to do to get through our grief. But naming them was the first step. They were real. They existed. You never met them, and I have only met one of them, but they existed. I carried them, felt them, and in a very deep way – I knew them. I also knew my early losses – the ones that I lost in my first trimester. I didn’t know their gender, and lately, it’s been happening so frequently that I am actually protecting myself from further pain by choosing not to name them. But they too, existed. They may or may not have had a viable heart beat, but they existed. They represented hope. Excitement. Unconditional love.All 9 of my children do. Living, and otherwise.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage

What means more to me than anything else in the world of grief is when my loved ones and those who have ever crossed my path but know of my story,  acknowledge that they existed. Two of my fellow loss mama friends went to a beach, one on our beautiful local island, and one in the white sands of Hawaii. They took a moment in their lives to think of my family – my children who never came to be. They wrote their names in the sand with nothing but love in mind. And for my babies who I never named, they honored them with fitting words and angel wings. I simply couldn’t fathom that people like this actually existed. Something so simple, gave me hope in unconditional friendship.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage
My friend introduced me to Orgami Owl custom jewelry and I was immediately drawn to the storytelling aspect of the charms. We immediately put together my story of loss, along with my wedding story and my family story divided into three separate lockets. In my loss locket, I chose the birth stones of my four babies that I lost in my 2nd trimester. To represent the earlier losses, I included a pregnancy and baby loss awareness ribbon as it represents both genders in pink and in blue. While we were making it a point to honor our losses, I found it fitting to add a paw print representing my two sweet dogs who I also lost in the last four years. The back plate simply states “as long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be“, quoted from Little Mama‘s favourite book by Robert Munsch – “I Love you, Forever“.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage

3:: A BUTTERFLY HEART ON CANVAS

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage
Another friend of mine who has also suffered loss, but with two beautiful twin boys, ever so lovingly created this gorgeous heart made of cut out butterflies on canvas. Its simplicity, yet profound sentiment left me speechless. This work of heart was such a creative way for my friend to let me know I was in her thoughts. There isn’t a moment in my everyday that I do not look fondly at this loving piece remembering how my heavy heart has been lifted by such acts of love and generosity

4:: A DONATION TO A GOOD CAUSE
 Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage
A very sweet couple – dear friends of mine, who had experienced the hardship of a prematurely born infant, made a wonderful donation in honor of all my babies. This project is known as Teeny Tears, where a group of volunteers make sets of diapers. I have never heard of this group until now, and was so moved beyond measure by this loving act of kindness. It is especially moving to know that donations go to support a charity for an issue otherwise suffered in silence. I am so grateful to now be associated to something so important. And I am especially grateful for my very loving and selfless friends.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage
A close family friend of ours has been following our story online. It’s amazing how the interwebs erase the miles between long distant friends. Little Mama and I were so touched that our friend sent over matching Miscarriage Memorial Bracelets in honor of baby and pregnancy loss, highlighting the very words that often fills a mother of loss’ mind: hope, believe, and faith. We wear this proudly, supporting the movement towards building awareness and breaking the silence. Positive change is one of the more inspiring and essential gifts for a mother of miscarriage.

5:: BOOKS, BASKETS, & MAGNETS

An extra special friend of mine, my co-host to our weekly #5Faves, Bonnie from The Koala Mom, as well as our dear friend Anna from Just East From Crazyland, delivered the most beautiful basket following the loss of my sweet  Charlie. I didn’t feel up to seeing anyone, strike up conversation, and putting my brave face on. However, Bonnie came by with loving intentions in mind, as she dropped off a basket with books relating to miscarriage, informational pamphlets for further support, bathing salts, jarred sauces, teas, oils, and an adorable little angel who has now found a home in Little Mama‘s collection. These loving ladies understood in the deepest way, the miracle of motherhood being mothers themselves, and Anna’s own painful experience of baby loss (please read her moving poetry here). As moms, they knew that I needed to take care of myself without having to say it. I was so moved by their outreach, and touched by the unbelievable amount of empathy and kindness that came along with preparing such a beautifully crafted basket.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage
And my dear friend did not stop there. Some of the most meaningful gifts for a mother of miscarriage can be made by the loving and creative hands of little ones too. Last Christmas, Bonnie’s little ladies utilized their remarkably creative skills to make me magnetic angels in honor of my previous losses. She included a devotional book about “Grieving the Child I Never Knew“. The handmade magnets sit on my fridge reminding me daily, how blessed I am to be surrounded by such love – from mamas, both big and small.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage

Bonus Fave :: A GIFT OF EXPRESSION… FROM MYSELF – TO MYSELF

Members of my baby loss support group planned a paint night. I had no idea what I was going to paint. I was hoping that I would just sit back, enjoy some yummy food and great conversation, while the other ladies immersed themselves in abstract art. Well – they wouldn’t let me leave with an empty canvas. Did I mention, these moms of loss are a determined bunch?? All of a sudden, I found myself with a brush in hand, mixing colors on a palette ready for what was to unfold.Let me back up for a moment. After my second late pregnancy loss in 2013 – where we actually met our sweet little William, my husband inadvertently processed his grief in the best way he knew – through art. He illustrated characters resembling the image in his mind of what his two babies would have looked like, if they were with us today. Unfortunately, after our third loss, he just didn’t have the heart to continue. Since then, I have been patiently waiting for him to complete our story for the three years to follow. Understandably, he just wasn’t there yet. So I took matters into my own unartistic hands and came up with this…It was the best present I could give to myself – a painting of Little Mama surrounded in love, by her siblings.A special thank you to my artistic friends for their final touches and support (’cause how can a pseudo artiste get anything done confidently without personal cheerleaders at the sidelines, right?), and of course, Cricut for making my life a zillion times easier by giving me options to make my baby’s individualities come to life.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage
That same evening, another loving mom of loss decided to spend her time painting our story as well, and how she saw it. She painted three birds representing myself, my husband, and my living child, Little Mama, on a branch together. We are surrounded by eight birds, something we believe deep in our hearts to be true. I couldn’t believe this was her form of expression for the evening. I went in not knowing what to expect, except that I was NOT an artist with anything in mind – later, leaving with two meaningful works of art that honors my children… my family.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage

I imagine it could be quite the challenge to find appropriate gifts for a mother of miscarriage. When in doubt, the best gift of all is a friend and family member’s presence. I have experienced heartache of losing a friend’s support as a result of my recurrent losses, and there’s no two ways about it, it hurts. But like anything else, when a window closes, a door opens. Very recently, many deep, honest, and loving friendships have entered my space. Out of tragedy, came something so beautiful and meaningful. I am beyond grateful for these new friendships that have taught me how to grow, how to love without condition, how to support during the worst of times, and cheer on during the best of times. I am grateful that I am understood.

Five Faves Five Beautiful Gifts To Give a Grieving Mother of Miscarriage

Be sure to visit our friend and co-host of #5faves at The Koala Mom for her fab list of #5faves this week!

We would love to hear some of YOUR five favorite things too. Link up below!

The best gift is the gift of love, understanding, and support, 

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DISCLOSURE: THIS POST CONTAINS AFFILIATE LINKS.

Filed Under: our fertility journey, Sass & Smalls gets real, the everyday Tagged With: acts of kindness, baby loss, friendship, gift ideas, gifts, grieving, grieving parents, memorial, miscarriage, moms of loss, pregnancy loss, recurrent loss, remembrance, stillbirth, stillborn

About Deb B.

Deb Balino is the voice behind Sass & Smalls, host of the newly launched Podcast - Sass & Small Talk, and a mom of two - an artistic and quirky 11-year-old, and an outspoken, homewrecking, retro music loving, 4-year-old. A décor and style enthusiast, as well as a home systems hack creator, with a mildly concerning obsession of all things "bin-worthy", Deb enjoys sharing products, experiences, progressive ideas, and simple shifts in mindset that has helped her family navigate the beautiful chaos of parenting. Deb is also a homeschool teacher, partially by choice, partially pandemic-inspired, while advocating and caring for her parents as an active member of the Sandwich Generation. With vulnerability, and a dash of humour - she shares the reality of her world, all while keeping things as sassy as they once were before the drool, meltdowns, and potty mishaps entered the picture.

Her creative ideas, lengthy storytelling, and everyday musings have been featured on Huffington Post, Yahoo Style, BBC News, and YMC.CA

Comments

  1. Bonnie Way says

    May 24, 2016 at 11:00 am

    Oh, Deb, these are beautiful. Hugs to you dear Mama. I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through this but so glad you have so many understanding friends around you. I wish I was closer and do more, but know that I’m praying and weeping with you.
    Bonnie Way recently posted…5 Supplements for Moms {five favourites} Vol. 25My Profile
    Reply
    • debalino says

      May 25, 2016 at 1:35 pm

      I really do have such amazing friends I’m surrounded with – including you, my friend :). And I do know you share your tears when the moments were especially unbearable. You’re so awesome, and I’ll never forget what you’ve done for me and my family. xx
      Reply
  2. Chris says

    May 24, 2016 at 7:27 pm

    What a phenomenal post! You have compiled such an amazing list of wonderfully thoughtful gifts…. I’m so terribly sorry you’ve suffered such losses.

    Thank you for sharing your heart. I, too, have suffered miscarriage and was touched by your words.

    It is so wonderful to meet you. I linked over at Koala Mom and saw that you, too, are hosting. THank you so much for your hospitality !

    I’ll be subscribing so I don’t miss any of the posts at your lovely home on the web!

    God bless,

    Chris

    Reply
    • debalino says

      May 25, 2016 at 1:36 pm

      Chris – thank you for sharing your story, and I’m so sorry you know of this painful experience as well. I’m so happy to meet you too, thank you for linking up and subscribing! Can’t wait to get to know you more! 🙂
      Reply
  3. Gingermommy says

    May 24, 2016 at 10:38 pm

    Such beautiful and thoughtful gifts! I love every single one of them <3
    Reply
    • debalino says

      May 25, 2016 at 1:38 pm

      I still am so blown away by the kindness. I have some amazing memorabilia in my house that helps me find peace. I still look at your custom made babyStylista sign as well and am still blown away by it. xx
      Reply
  4. Randa @ The Bewitchin' Kitchen says

    May 25, 2016 at 7:56 am

    Beautiful gifts, my favorite one is the first one. <3 It's a hard time of year for me too.
    Reply
    • debalino says

      May 25, 2016 at 1:39 pm

      Isn’t it so beautiful? You can imagine the tears upon receiving them. Oh Randa… I think of you often. I was so touched by your post that you “tbt’d” from a while ago. We all know each other’s hearts when it comes to this profound loss. Glad we have each other. Sending love mama… xx
      Reply
  5. Tina says

    May 26, 2016 at 6:05 am

    I just love this entire post!! Thank you for sharing 🙂 I am so very glad to call you ‘family’. I think of you all often and I wish we lived closer but I know that our hearts are forever fused not just by blood but by the mysterious ways of the heart- knowing your pain, sharing your sorrow, loving each other. Hugs to you, love.
    Reply
    • debalino says

      May 31, 2016 at 10:20 pm

      Sending so much love back to you sweet Tina. It’s really amazing how matters of the heart like loss and pain can bring people together in a way that no other experience can. I am blessed to have you as family as well and you are never far from my thoughts either. I wish I could see you more often so that we can just sit and laugh and cry together for hours. For now – thanks for visiting us over in our corner of the interwebs. We’ll be together soon. Love you!
      Reply

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SOMETHING * IS * BREWING :: A #behindthescenes gli SOMETHING * IS * BREWING :: A #behindthescenes glimpse of what feels like the beginning of a powerful shift in #womenshealth right here in #Victoria.

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You probably didn’t realize how much you and your kids impacted our day.

My son had just missed the first few minutes of the egg hunt (as usual, this mama was running late with a million things on her plate—homeschooling, caregiving, promoting a show, working from home, managing the home, advocating, feeding the young and old, managing moods... the usual chaos).

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“Join Deb and local lifestyle creator and entrepreneur, Natasha Mills of @mommamillsblog. Natasha reveals her bold shift from a successful corporate career to building a personal brand from home, striving for family balance while advocating for her community in Victoria, BC. Will this new path bring the joy she seeks, or will it come with its own set of challenges and #burnout? Tune in for an inspiring discussion on making a #careerpivot, finding purpose, and evolving as a recovering high achiever.”

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After years of #caregiving, #homeschooling, and navigating life in a #neurodivergent family… I hit a wall. 

Hello, #Burnout. 👋 

But thanks to @telus and the @storyhive Video Podcast Program, I sat down with fellow parents, experts, and some of the most resilient humans right here in Victoria, BC to have the conversations we ALL need.

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AUTISTIC BURNOUT :: Did you know there was such a AUTISTIC BURNOUT :: Did you know there was such a thing?

Me Neither! 

But it sure helped me understand my #neurdodivergent not-so-baby teen daughter who has been in #burnout mode for years. Gaining understanding of this aspect of burnout helps us find ways to cope when it creeps up on us as parents - and especially for our children. 

Here’s a #behindthescenes look of my talk on @sassandsmalltalkpodcast filmed at the amazing creative studios of @haus.of.owl with @kkayjudas at @sacred_advantage. She is our wonderful guest and a dear friend (and incredible advocate for my daughter specifically), who shares insight and personal experience on #autisticburnout in this raw and honest interview about how she navigated (continues to navigate) life on the spectrum especially during burnout. I may or may not have shed a tear… or 10… 🤷🏻‍♀️

Tune in on @telus OptikTV Channel 9, stream+ on MAY 6th, and @storyhive YouTube on May 27th  to watch this compelling episode. 

And giving extra love to my beautiful and talented daughter who fine tuned the edit of this video! How blessed am I to be the mama of this creative young lady. Now gimme my phone back!!! 🤨

Have you or a loved one experienced Autistic Burnout?
Behind every #sandwichgeneration #entrepreneural # Behind every #sandwichgeneration #entrepreneural #homeschool #mom with #ADHD and #spicy kids, is: 
• a floor filled with painful-to-step-on toys and crafts
• Sniffly kiddos every few weeks 
• nothing crossed off her to-do list
• hundreds of unanswered texts/emails
• and a #mentalload sometimes too overwhelming to carry 

But unlike all the other gloomy seasons I’ve experienced this tough season, I have never felt such peace. 

WHY: 

• I have been walking through my #faithjourney with George and it’s been giving me a different outlook on everything life has thrown our way. My sistas in faith have kept us afloat this tough season @esther.driver @caarly.xo @lishgarv @nicoleacaldwell 

• I have been intentional on fixing my #guthealth, #cortisollevels, and #cognitivefunction with my daily #HJ #happy blend drink, and it has done wonders to my #mentalwellness  and overall health. <DM me for more info on this game changer drink>.

• I’ve been learning to just live in the moment and not be so caught up with doing EVERYTHING all at once. 

• I’m surrounding myself (albeit virtually and in spirit) with some of my chosen fam who probably get the most neglect of all, but still give me grace while I clumsily navigate this crazy season @nengineermom @rahannavu  @iamharpsra 
@m_stiggity 
@jenny_p1987  @westislanddesigns @kkayjudas @teacuphuman09 @i_am_miss_jen @swanny80 @trishita_namagita 

• Even though my business relies heavily on my #online presence, I’m giving myself grace for fully immersing myself in the needs of my family this last month I’ve been MIA. I know I can pick up where I left off, and lean on my mentors & biz sistas to pull me out of the seasonal funk @caitoaks @mommamillsblog, @happybalancemama @sweetmamalifedaily, and get back on track. 

Busy, overwhelmed mama… I see you. This is just a season. Do what you need to do, especially for you and your loved ones. Everything will still be there ready for you to “tackle” when you’re ready. 

And what losing two loved ones these last couple weeks has taught me - we’re only here temporarily. Spend your time earthside doing what you love, and loving who you love. @gjavier5 ❤️
No amount of “juice” can lessen the exposure t No amount of “juice” can lessen the exposure to elementary school winter bugs, but it sure came in handy when we need it IN & OUT of our household. 

Especially since I have elderly under my care. 

It skipped George and I entirely - but it definitely hit our two little ones, as bugs do. 

After a nice, tall glass of kid’s #HJ (mixed with some mango edge+ for my bigger and pickier smallie) - along with a nice snuggly nap - the symptoms were way less vicious than previous colds, and gone by the time I blended them their dose the next morning. 

It’s not some miracle drink with empty promises - it’s just ALL the good stuff in a glass. 

DM me if you want a sip for yourself or your sniffly kiddos. I’m telling you, our overall health and wellness as a family, has improved, since focusing on our #guthealth.

There is no price too high to pay for overall #wellness.

#happyblend #amare #fluseason
Impromptu check-in with my girl, Nicole from @happ Impromptu check-in with my girl, Nicole from @happybalancemama talking about all things #Amare. The reality behind #burnout,  #mentalwellness, finding our way through the everyday challenges and #mentalload of #motherhood, and how both of our lives have SHIFTED dramatically since starting our journey with fixing our #guthealth. 

#happyblend #juice #GBX #gutbrainconnection #gutbrainaxis #gutbrainhealth #gutbrain #motherhood #overwhelm
C O R T I S O L :: If you’re anything like me, y C O R T I S O L :: If you’re anything like me, you’ve tried to amp up in overall wellness - doing ALL the things…  and nothing worked 🪀🪀🪀🪀🪀 

ME THEN:(4.5 mnths + 4 decades ago)

• Cortisol levels out of control 
• Made self-sabotaging choices 
 • giving into sugar cravings
 • staying up all night doom 
  scrolling & researching 
  how to “fix” my life/kids/home 
  leading to #burnout
• Poor time management
• Emotionally charged and reactive due to poor quality sleep 

• What REALLY needed the most help - was my GUT. <ENTER #HJ #Amare #cortisolcontrol>

ME NOW: 

• Boost in: mood, motivation, metabolism, energy
• reduced bloating and inflammation
• Cravings gone, due to regulated blood sugar
• #cortisol #puffyface gone
• Better quality and DEEPER sleep
• Balanced hormones
• Improved cognitive function and no brain fog

** ADDED BONUS: A more organized home 
** DOUBLE ADDED BONUS: I’m the best mom I have ever been for my kiddos: ⬇️ reactive, ⬆️stress resilience

✨✨What I’m doing 👇🏼✨✨

• I mixed these two (or three) very simple supplements (EASY for my busy brain)
• First Supplement: Mood/Motivation/Metabolism - decreased bloating 
• Second supplement: Balanced hormones & mental wellness, improved skin, deeper sleep

2025 - I’m here for ya. BRING. IT. ON.

Comment CORTISOL OR just DM me, and I’ll send you more info and a link! 🥳
LIVE:: Sass & Small Chats with my girl Nicole @hap LIVE:: Sass & Small Chats with my girl Nicole @happybalancemama, before Mama Duty calls!  Chatting all things “Happy Blend”. We’ll do another spontaneous Live 2.0 when it’s not so nice outside!! For now - here’s a little bit of my personal experience with the Happy Blend  and how it’s made major shifts in mine and my family’s lives.  #30DayMentalwellnesschallenge
G R I N C H :: Just over here dreaming of a #green G R I N C H :: Just over here dreaming of a #greenChristmas when the kids and I had more time, energy, and gumption to do community deliveries to our local heroes. 

Since the #Pandemic, this little tradition of ours have stopped but our gratitude remains. @saanichpolice @saanichfiredepartment, Victoria Fertility Clinic, Sherwood Dental, and some of our buds who held our hands through our #grief and #fertility journey. 

Sigh. Was fun while it lasted. 

Thank you @dee_monster_girl @adammessana  @fiendwithoutaface87 for the inspo.

#throwback #grinch #Christmas
#NationalFamilyCaregiversMonth #november P I N K #NationalFamilyCaregiversMonth #november 

P I N K :: I recently learned that flamingos lose their pink when caring for others (notably, mom flamingos) —and I felt that deeply this past year. When my sweet elderly Mama had an unfortunate fall, resulting in emergency surgery, an extended hospital stay, and complete dependence on full time care, I was torn between moving in and being there for her full-time, caring for my sick kids and husband, homeschooling, and managing my business. 

I lost my pink.

Everything else—work, plans, even my son’s birthday—had to wait. Our home was a mess, appointments were missed, mistakes were made, friendships were tested, and the mental load was heavy. But nothing compared to watching my once strong Mama feel powerless as she leaned into the support she needed but once resisted.

My Mom lost her pink. 

It was a season of sacrifice, but now returning the equipment, that helped with her recovery, is a moment I’ll never forget.  I can now see from a clear lens, that working together as a family (my own family, my brother’s, my parents), we made it through, with the power of faith, a supportive community and amazing and understanding friends, love, and especially prayer.

It feels so good to stand back and see the full picture. And best of all… 

Both my Mama and I got our pink back.

@redcrosscanada 

#Caregiving #FamilyFirst #Gratitude #FlamingoFeels #FaithAndFamily
M A G G I E :: 🎉 Some #BTS #onthepod @sassandsm M A G G I E :: 🎉 Some #BTS #onthepod @sassandsmalltalkpodcast with my long lost twin and the hilariously brilliant MAGGIE of @thecatmompodcast ! We’re diving deep into life with a #SpicyBrain 🧠, talking all things #ADHD, and how she’s been navigating motherhood, chaos, and #burnout like the absolute rockstar she is. 💥

🎂 Oh, and did I mention it’s her #BIRTHDAY today?! 🎈 Be sure to give @minimaggie ALL the love in the comments! 🥳👇🏻

This episode, filmed at @haus.of.owl, is packed with so much relatable insight (and laughter... SO. MUCH. LAUGHTER 😂). Catch it #comingsoon #2025 on @TELUS OptikTV @storyhive! You won’t want to miss this one. 💬🎙️

Life just got a little more interesting @gjavier5 @ianshockeycards. Our apologies in advance… #doubletrouble 👭🏻
MY. FAM. IS. THRIVING. That is all. DM (and Fo MY. FAM. IS. THRIVING. 

That is all. 

DM (and Follow me) for deets on this amazing EASY 30sec Wellness supplement (and other #Amare Go-tos) that has elevated this family from shaking things up in the gut (bye 💩 probs), to clearing things up in the 🧠 (Wait - they actually WANT to learn? 🤯) … NOTHING ELSE has worked THIS GOOD for this family of Neuro-Ds. 

It’s not just some magic fix. 
It’s au naturale. Backed by science.
It’s #guthealth.
It’s #cognitivefunction.
Down to the cellular level.

✨ Sidenote: “Thriving” doesn’t mean, perfect, always happy, or that everyone is ALWAYS on the same page. 

That would just be weird. 

It means: 
• our target areas of concern (individually) are being addressed. 
• less chaos, more peace. 
• less reactive, less defensive
• more motivation, less resistance

We’re all collectively on our way to overall physical and mental wellness. 

And the best part is - all the kids care about is that it tastes darrrrrrrrn good. 

So what are you waiting for?
C O N N E C T I O N :: Now that George and I are b C O N N E C T I O N :: Now that George and I are both focusing on our COLLECTIVE #cortisolbalance - both our relationship and our kids benefit from these changes: 

• no longer reactive (to each other/kids)
• more playful with the kids, no longer irritable 
• have the #mentalclarity to pause and let each other have a say
• more well-rested - due to resisting #sleeprevenge (guys, I actually WANT to sleep now!! WHAT!??) 
• less overwhelm by everyday stressors
• tackle to-dos faster, together - procrastination completely not our thing anymore

** And the best and most shocking of them all… I am no longer impulsive with needless, emotional-spending, and that alone is a 🎁 for George! 

So many men and women in our age group are struggling like we were, only a few months ago.

This healthy cortisol mocktail is a daily favorite, takes 30 seconds to make, and is filled with adaptogens and healthy ingredients!

Comment CORTISOL and I’ll send you what we’ve been using to get to the bottom of our cortisol issues. WITH a $10 discount + 10% savings. 

✨ follow me for more simple tips for cortisol, weight, sleep, and stress for mamas and our partners too!

✨ Make sure you are following me to get the DM!

P. S. my husband prioritizes my daily intake as much as his own because we both know - “Happy wifey, easier Lifey” 😂☺️
P A R T N E R S H I P :: Our live discussion with P A R T N E R S H I P :: Our live discussion with Graham Meckling, Author, Coach, Educator, Community builder - as he launches his amazing and groundbreaking Online community at @truedad.community.

With focus on building the foundation as a team/partnership/family even PRIOR to becoming one, and how it’s a complete Gamechanger when faced with the reality of parenting in the coming years. 

Be sure to share this with any new parents-to-be who might need this resource - a sibling, a friend, a coworker, a distant cousin who you only seem to know on IG - we all know someone who might feel a little lost as they navigate this new chapter in their lives. This is not your everyday community - so grab a spot and find the community you never really know you needed! 

Seasoned parents - Graham’s book “Babies Don’t talk” has wonderful insights that are just as applicable to any stage of parenting as it is for the new parent - so GRAB YOUR COPY! I did and George and I ate it right up!
Found her. • • And right behind this once #b Found her. 
•
•

And right behind this once #burntout #Mama, finding her way back into her element again, sass-inclusive, are these #behindthescenes (behind the camera/desk/computer/headphones) MIRACLE WORKERS at @hausofowl. I have so much love for you guys. Thank you. 

@nikkye_music 
@hoelune 
@remy.is.remy 
@jakerfilms 

Not seen here but will pop up here and there as I catch them in action 🤞🏼 hint hint): @laaain_music @eric.thebald 

•
•

And none of this would’ve even been a thang if it weren’t for the Video Podcast Grant Program with @telus @storyhive. Life changing is an understatement. Thank you @made.by.donny & @thereallindakee for encouraging your girl to take the plunge with @sassandsmalltalkpodcast 

•
•

And the energy and gumption to keep me resilient, and in tip top shape to host my own show, and lead my own project - kudos to my girl @mommamillsblog who introduced me to the very #cortisoldrink I needed to amp up. And @caitoaks who also reminds me I got this. My gut and brain thank you both. #bestteamever

And my love, @gjavier5 - I’m doing this not just for me but for us and our little peeps. Thank you for leading the cheering squad and “assisting”
me when I need it most. Hope to make you guys proud. ❤️ 

•
•

Moral of the story, in getting that dang SASS back: 
✨ Take Risks
✨ Get your gut health in check 🥤
✨ Find your peeps 
✨ Tell them how awesome they are

DM me, watch my stories, click on my bio links if you want in on any of this good stuff! 🥤 + 🎙️ + 💰📺

✨Be sure to give a little ❤️ to my 13 year old Smallie who helped me level up with this reel with her magic touch. #ASD #autism #thisishomeschool #homeschooler #mygirl #techgirl #daughter
I’m 1/2 a century, baby. #HappyBirthday to me, i I’m 1/2 a century, baby. #HappyBirthday to me, indeed.
#thisisme

And life just got a little sweeter. 

It’s not some secret recipe, or some overcomplicated skin regimen. 

It’s #faith
Motivation
The want
The humility to accept help
The unconditional love from family
Learning to say no to the wrong, and yes to the right. 

I took a chance on ME a few months ago, and since then, have seen a shift in myself.

I dreaded this #milestonebirthday for the last 10 years. I dreaded ESPECIALLY, being transparent to ANYONE… even my own kids. 

But it dawned on me. 

(With the help of my fellow #hypewoman gals that gave me the gentle nudge to OWN my age, not hide it) @sweetmamalifedaily  @nengineermom @mommamillsblog  @caitoaks  @lilkeez @iamharpsra  @rahannavu @mstiggity

Why hide it? 
What am I scared of? 

I DID IT!

I hit 1/2 a century, I survived 9 brutal pregnancy losses, and held one of them in my arms. I looked death in the eye, and through prayer and community - I came out of it alive and kicking. AND thriving.

It wasn’t my time. I still have work to do here. 

But even with these life altering moments in my life, I STILL:
• made bad health choices
• stretched myself to max capacity
• said YES to things that stifled my growth.
• said NO to hard things that meant growth
• lived in debilitating fear, daily
• allowed my #adhd to paralyze, not enhance my life
• had horrible boundaries… correction… I had no boundaries 

It took 50 years, (3 months ago, to be exact), but I found exactly what I needed: 
• A deeper connection with God
• Gratitude
• A go-to, easy #cortisol #drink that balances out those darn hormones, and targets my #Mentalwellness #HJ 
• Forgiveness and freedom from past hurts 
• An awesome studio to do my craft @haus.of.owl
• A killer program that funds said craft @Telus @storyhive 
• A loving approach #wifey, #specialneeds Mama & #caregiver Daughter
• Self Compassion
• And the GUMPTION to follow (FIX) my Gut. 

Thank you to those who remembered when I chose to forget, that turning 50 is a blessing, not a curse. 

DM me or comment 50 if you want in on this big secret.
✨ I N S I D E * O U T ✨ :: If you wanna see ho ✨ I N S I D E * O U T ✨ :: If you wanna see how HAPPY J blend has made a difference for me, and coincidentally - the family - take a look at our Behind the scenes of this year’s Inside Out FAM-O-WEEN —an honest, messy, and very real snapshot of our year. 2024 was a DOOZY. 

From frustration, to resistance, to acceptance, to finding Joy again (with a DAILY DOSE of HAPPY J and a whoooooole lotta Jesus) - each character felt like a reflection of this year’s whirlwind of emotions. It’s been a time of big decisions, finding our footing, embracing transitions, more sleepless nights,  a diagnosis we’ve been waiting a decade for, falls, accidents, sickness - the whole shebang of emotions. 

And then #anxiety reared its ugly head.  In full force. 

But, alongside family and close friends, Faith, and some yummy sips of a healthy supplement, carried us through. 

In a year that stretched us to our limits, this shoot felt like the perfect way to honour all the “inside out” moments we’ve faced. So here’s to the messy, the joyful, and even the challenging times that shape who we are. From deep #burnout and anxiety to discovering our faith and mental wellness, I’m stepping into the next chapter with a full heart and maybe a few more laughs (even if I’m a year older 😉).

Here’s to growth, gratitude, and whatever’s next. #FamOWeen2024 #InsideOutLife #EmotionalYear #insideout #FindingJoy #Milestonebirthday
#NewChapter #amare #happyblend #hj #happyjuice

Music - AndreaDatzman, 
BENJIxScarlett, TheeOnlyJanessahhh
E M O T I O N S :: #HAPPYHALLOWEEN #FAMOWEEN editi E M O T I O N S :: #HAPPYHALLOWEEN #FAMOWEEN edition! 

2024 has been quite the year of change for us all. Emotions have been all over the map!
• #Caregiving has been amped up with unexpected falls and hospital stays 
• Our little not so little teen is on her last year of Middle school #homeschool version - not so easy but hey, surviving. #Disgust
• Our little guy cut his once curly locks and became a little man overnight - no tears except a very #sad dad who suffered from FOMO #Anger
• George also cut his hair that was once down to his waist. He was ready to let go of the weight of the world literally on his shoulders.
• I got selected for a wonderful @TELUS @Storyhive project to do a broadcast version of my #podcast and got my Juju back #happytears
• and yes… I found the perfect match for me to deal with my very neglected #guthealth, and yes… it’s a Gamechanger that has been behind the true shift in my mental health, productivity, and my road to a better me. Hence, “Happy” #Joy. #happyjuice

All these emotions check out. #insideOut we have thrived and survived. 

Happy Halloween!
S N E A K * P E E K :: I’m so excited to share a S N E A K * P E E K :: I’m so excited to share a little sneak peek of @theoutpostboardgamecafe, our good friend’s soon-to-be-opened #boardgame café, right here in the #Westshore 🎲🎲. The ONLY ONE of its kind in THIS part of town!! 🎉🎉We’ve ALL been waiting for this… 

Mamas… I’m looking at you… 👀

✨
✨ 

It’s been amazing watching this space come together - already such a fun vibe and a cozy spot to hang out, play some games, and connect with friends. And I already got my #gameschool curriculum ready to go for my #homeschooler (and her game lovin’ mama-teacher 🙋🏻‍♀️) to enjoy. And of course date nights with my guy and girls night with my ladies!! 

✨
✨

They’re getting so close to opening, and I can’t wait for everyone to experience it in person!! 

✨
✨

Be sure to SHARE THIS POST AND SPREAD THE WORD - #Grandopening is Nov 1st!! 🎗️✂️ Stay tuned for more updates—it’s going to be a game-changer! 😉 

#TheOutpostCafe #supportlocal #supportsmallbusiness #supportlocalbusiness #YYJ #vancouverisland #Victoria #langford #boredombuster #family
F E A R L E S S :: Becoming a mom changed me, and F E A R L E S S :: Becoming a mom changed me, and along the way, my confidence started to slip. The bold, carefree version of me was replaced by someone who worried about the little things—like making a simple left turn onto a highway (with nothing but a stop sign and a prayer).

For years, I avoided that turn. I’d ask trusted adults to drive my kid for these once a year field trips, while I anxiously waited for updates. Sometimes, if I couldn’t arrange a ride, I’d keep her home. No amount of spawning salmon is worth my sanity.

It sounds trivial to the average person, but that turn felt like a mountain I couldn’t climb - for 12 years!!! A really winding, single lane, high speed, intolerant and unforgiving mountain to climb.

✨✨✨✨✨

Enter my Happy Blend Morning supplement.

After a few weeks of working on my gut health and balancing hormones, including cortisol, I feel lighter—mentally and emotionally. The anxiety that used to grip me just… doesn’t anymore.

Something in me felt COMPELLED to make that turn. It was my actual, nurtured, gut telling me to not take the backroad out (which is 3 times the distance), and it felt like freedom. 

I’ve learned it’s not just about turning left on a highway; it’s about letting go of fear and no longer caring what others think. My people-pleasing feature was activated as I approached the turn - worrying about the driver behind me, but now, I prioritize what’s best for me and my loved ones. And what’s best for my loved ones is that they get the chance to enjoy an educational experience, without my anxious brain standing in the way.

I am mentally clear, more logical, and becoming resilient where stress once controlled me. I’m ME again, free from imbalanced hormones, and the fear of inconveniencing others.

If this resonates with you, drop “FEARLESS” in the comments, and I’ll share what I’ve been using to get here. You’re not alone. #MomLife
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